Jim Nabors plux Eraserhead times infinity.

Birthday 25

Mon, 09 Mar 2009 19:32:39 GMT

, then

X $200.

+

The CBHL releases Don't Fight It, Feel It by the Secret Intentions and Daylight Ramblings and Fever Dreams by J. David Black are now available for purchase at Charlemagne Records and Renaissance Records.

Fri, 06 Mar 2009 05:45:17 GMT

Good Changes:
1.) I can feel my addiction to social networking sites dwindling. I haven't checked livejournal for about a week and I haven't checked facebook for several days, either. Normally I would have checked them a few times each day. There isn't anything on them, and I'm busy. I like being busy, and I think spending tons of time on facebook or livejournal is a symptom of not having enough to do. (In my case, at least) So I've solved it. I just stopped by to brag.
2.) Working on applying for non-profit status for Cigar Box Home Library. I feel this is attainable, and the work required is fulfilling. I am finally having to itemize the reasons for the existence of this orgnazation in a way that suits will understand.
3.) I have been budgeting like hell. I no longer feel broke, even though the majority of each of my paychecks is already earmarked. I am simply putting the money I make towards 1.) prior obligations and 2.) practical purchases.
4.) I got rid of about 90% of the books I owned. I have a lot of space, and I am not buying books to replace this. I am not spending money on books this way, and I am not filling my apartment with things that I won't pay attention to.
5.) A friend drew me a picture of a man and a woman having sex in missionary position. The man is defecating. I hung it up on my wall tonight.
6.) CBHL had a rummage sale at Bottletree last week. We made $650, which is more money than we've ever had. We can now afford to finance most of the publications we will want to do for the forseeable future.
7.) A new girl. ;)
8.) Plastic clothes hangers.

Bad Changes:
1.) Jimmy Fallon

Fri, 13 Feb 2009 00:34:51 GMT

I want to tell you some shit that this thing made me think about.

1.) Romance and romantic relationships are for suckers. I don't know why, but this shit has made me angry. Life is a series of things to be done for different reasons. Some things have to be done alone. But being involved in a romance makes one more likely to think that two can do it better. No. Two people are a crowd in some cases, and being in a relationship is going to get in the fucking way. Some things have to be done by more than one person, but I'm gonna let you know that those things need to be done by more than two people. In the gauzy haze of romance, you may try to tell yourself that you can do everything important in a two-person method, but you're wrong. You either need to widen out and embrace a larger group of people with every bit of passion that you have been reserving for your favorite, or you need to suck it up and be by yourself. Because that's what this is all about. Romance is an elaborate way for your body to get you to make a baby, and it's enforced by the insecurities we've been taught to live with. You want to fuck because somewhere in the back of your head, you want to make a baby. And you want someone to help you be okay. No. No. You're not okay, and no one can fix that. Fuck what everyone says, and own up. Being alone and trying to work out what is wrong with you is in so many ways superior to being lazy and thinking it's okay to be a jerk because one person is as needy as you are.

2.) I'm not trying to tell you that you should have sex with anyone you want. No. Because sex is fucking boring and awkward and gross. You need to live like a monk and fix your own shit instead of making internet cartoons telling everyone to get a real job so someone will love them, because.

3.) Fuck someone loving you and fuck a real job! Just get a job. Who cares what it pays, because like I said, and like Jesus tried to tell you fools, you need to sell all your shit and live like a monk while you're figuring out what's wrong with you. If being a barista is enough for you, money wise and/or ambition wise, then do it. It's easy. Just don't work corporate and you'll probably be pretty happy. Once you establish a work history in small businesses, then other small businesses will be more willing to hire you. They won't pay much, but you need to quit buying so much shit anyway, even for other people. If you want to make a gesture to show that you care for someone, then you need to do better than giving them some trinket you had no more hand in than trading pieces of paper for it. So fuck what they said about that. And also, don't think think I'm telling you to try and make money with creative endeavors or to "do what you love." No. Don't try to pay the bills doing what you're passionate about. If you care enough about it, i would try to avoid involving the poisonous taint of the dreaded greenback.

Two great minds on this:

Charles Ives: "Perhaps the birth of art will take place at the moment in which the last man who is willing to make a living out of art is gone and gone forever..." (I want you to know that Charles Ives worked at an insurance agency until he died, all the while being one of the most inventive and productive American composers of his time. He poured needed funds into the art world by working elsewhere, instead of stealing the dreaded greenbacks from where they were needed.)

Cindy Lauper: "Money changes everything."

You know? I mean, I don't care what the fuck any of you do. I don't care what anyone does. But I have enough trouble knowing that everyone thinks my worldview is wrong without being confronted with abrasive and shittily drawn comics about why it's wrong.

Fri, 06 Feb 2009 19:39:00 GMT

Things I used to like, but don't like so much anymore:
Pearlized buttons/western shirts
Side-zips on boots
Long hair
Corduroy

Things I used to not like but like a lot now:
Boat shoes
Loafers
Epaulets
Short hair
Lace boots (not work boots, though)
Khakis
Polo Shirts

Today I remembered that I used to wear undershirts under every shirt I wore. If it was a t-shirt day, it was a 2 t-shirt day. If I buy some white undershirts with V-neck collars, you won't be able to see the collar and I won't have to wash my shirts as often.

Thu, 05 Feb 2009 04:56:46 GMT

1.) I owe $300 to the taxes. Luckily, I had already arranged to set back $300 for non-essentials.

2.) Skeleton Family artwork is finished!

Mon, 12 Jan 2009 22:35:46 GMT

Idea:

The sequel film as postmodernism.

Examples of Subversions or Deconstructions:

Smokey and the Bandit 3 vs Smokey and the Bandit

Son of Frankenstein vs. Frankenstein and Bride of Frankenstein.

plans

Fri, 02 Jan 2009 04:12:53 GMT

I: Living room:

A.) I have a couch, but I feel that chairs are a silly way to relax. Why have your legs dangling? Why not sit closer to the ground?

B.) Solution: Find a futon mattress and some pillows. Build a headboard about a foot and a half tall and the width of said futon mattress and you're better off. (To prevent slipping of the mattress, it might be good to build a simple frame.) You can lie down and watch television! Fuck raised seating, just put that fucker on the floor. Why do we sit so high up? Everyone just wants to lie down anyway.

C.) I have a lot of books that take up a lot of space, and cause a need for several shelves. These have cost me a lot of money, they are consistently a problem to organize properly and keep up with, and I will probably never read them (even if I were going to, most of these books could be found for free at a local library).

D.) Solution:

1: Whittle books down to a bare minimum (that being books that were given to me or that have proven their worth to me), which probably means 50 books at maximum. Excess books can be sold at a rummage sale or sold online to help fund CBHL, because there are a lot of them.

2: Wall mount two shelves for books, each about 3 feet long, using sturdy shelving brackets. (If each shelf is only going to hold 25 books, I feel that there won't be much problem on the load-bearing side of things, but I seems that 6 total feet might be too much. More research will be done and plans will be retro-fitted accordingly).

3: Now that I am freed of the necessity for floored shelving, I can house my LPs in a way that is friendlier to flipping if I go so far as to build a tub, approximately 2 feet wide X 2 feet long X 1 foot deep and set on a table approximately 1.5 feet off the ground (an end table with legs sawed short might suffice once the crate itself is completed).

II. Workspace:

A.) My workspace is at present confined to a dining room table with milk-crates stacked on it. All my computer stuff is stacked high and there's no real way to make any kind of filing system or any other method for keeping everything organized. Not to mention that the size and (necessary) positioning of said dining table makes it inconvenient to get to my cabinets, now placed to the right of the workspace (when looking in the space from out).

B.) The Solution:

1: Workspace part 1 (Idea comes from Evan G.):
Build a loft above my bed, which is just a mattress and box-spring on the floor. The ceiling in the bedroom is 8 feet high, meaning that to give myself a comfortable height for sitting on this study loft, it will have to be about 4 feet below the ceiling, and about 4 feet above the floor. The loft will be 5.5 feet wide, 7.5 feet deep, made of 11 planks 6 inches wide and 5.5 feet long (an inch high), and will be supported by a frame of 4x4's. Preferably it will be topped with plexiglass.
On the loft I will keep two coffee tables 3.5 feet wide and 1.5 feet deep to use as desks (as I said before, fuck chairs), each placed at one end, as well as a set of wire drawers and a small bookshelf. One will be used as a computer table and will house computer accoutrements (laptop, speakers, hard-drive, printer). The other will be used for drafting or other hand-writing purposes. The wire drawers and bookshelf will obviously be used for storage.
For further storage, a bulletin style pinboard and a pegboard will be used, one for mapping ideas, one for hanging cords and other loose items.

2: Workspace part 2:
Eliminate dining room table. Replace with coffee table identical to the tables placed on the study loft. Above this, hang each of my guitars (of which there are 6). Above this, hang a shelf 6 feet long for storage of other items not readily hung. This, obviously, will be used as a recording space.

I heart interior design

Fri, 02 Jan 2009 01:35:02 GMT

But I politely decline.

Tue, 30 Dec 2008 17:03:36 GMT

1: The Woodring Monitor

2:

Sat, 27 Dec 2008 02:59:38 GMT

Wed, 17 Dec 2008 04:10:22 GMT

I want you guys to know about some things I got. I'm pretty excited about them, obviously

1.) These loafers, , which I posted about a while back. Unfortunately, the boots are still not within my grasp, but I am prepared to go on living this way.

2.) Glenn Gould's collection of Radio Documentaries known as the Solitude Trilogy. 3 hours of Glenn Gould talking about the joys of being alone. I can't wait!

3.) The near-complete discography of Sublime Frequencies, the record label run by Alan Bishop of the amazing Sun City Girls. Some of the albums are just radio collage, meaning that they are the sound of a person turning on a radio in another country and flipping the dials. Sounds like a good idea to me.

4.) These moccasins, , which I bought as house shoes but can't resist wearing as normal shoes.

No other news.

Thu, 11 Dec 2008 06:27:25 GMT

I just watched an advertisement for a stop-smoking aid. It features a woman who says that she is addicted to nicotine because she smokes 1 cigarette at 6:30 am, then has another on the way to work, then another at 10 am on the nose, then one after lunch, and so on.

This woman's day, for all intents and purposes, is 7 hours old and she's only had five cigarettes.

My days go like this: I wake up, roll over and light a cigarette. I put my glasses on after this and go use the bathroom. Then I smoke a cigarette while I take Dali out. I sometimes shower, then smoke a cigarette while I get dressed, then another in the car on the way to work. I go into work, work for about an hour, then smoke a cigarette. I smoke a cigarette approximately every hour until I get off work, then another on the way home from work. If we backtrack and look at my day, I have smoked almost as many cigarettes as this woman in the advertisement before I even leave the house. She doesn't need help.

Wed, 03 Dec 2008 23:48:19 GMT

Glenn Gould was an interesting person. It should be noted, however, that Glenn Gould played classical music.

I slammed my finger in a door a few weeks ago. It hurt for a little while, then I could see a scab on the finger, and blood under the nail. The blood eventually went away and the scab fell off, and for a while now I've just had a white spot where I could tell the nail wasn't connected anymore. I've been all like "way cool! I can't wait to see what happens here!" seriously. Here's what happened: The fingernail started to come unattached at the wrong end the other day, like it was no longer connected to my cuticle. I was still feeling pretty good about it, and every now and then I would pry it open a little bit to see the little cave it had made. Because of this prying, the nail got more and more loose, and today I decided to do some exploring. Using scissors, fingernail clippers, and teeth, I did away with the disconnected portion of nail to find that the nail had actually continued to grow underneath the portion of disconnected original nail. It kind of dead-ends where the original nail becomes re-connected. I feel now that I will have a funny looking fingernail forever. I'm not sure how I feel about it yet, but as for right now, I keep feeling like the fucked up nail is going to get caught on something. I've known a lot of people who smashed their fingers or toes as children and now have some kind of weird finger or toe nail, but I've never known anyone who had this on their pointer finger on their right hand. Maybe I'm the king?

Let's just say that me being the king is why I've been keeping to myself of late. I've been enjoying it.

Tue, 02 Dec 2008 22:02:31 GMT

http://www.myspace.com/sanserac

This is San Serac. I saw him play last night with Wilderness. I want to run it down with you.

The opener was Imaginary Planes, from Birmingham. It was pretty good, but I didn't feel like it fit with Serac and Wilderness. The show was pretty dead from the moment I got there, and I realized by the time Planes started that no one else was coming. They played, and I stood and watched soberly by myself. I had understood that Teen Getaway was going to play as well, but when the curtain came up for the second time, there was just one guy with a lot of keyboards and an Ipod. He said "This reminds me of this one time that..." and then pressed on the keyboard to make an atmospheric noise. After doing this for a second, he pressed play on the Ipod and started singing. The stage was unlit, and he was holding a reading light up to his face. It was pretty awesome, and I could see a few people dancing their asses off. One person even got up on the stage with Serac. So I walked up to the stage with the four other people and started to realize that it was Wilderness, just dancing their hearts out. Serac finished one original and then did a set of covers including Peter Gabriel and Pet Shop Boys. It kind of made my century.

Anyway, Wilderness had backlined behind Serac, so they played pretty soon after he wrapped up. I want to make it clear that at this point, Serac was sitting on the stage eating and I was one of 2 or 3 people standing on the floor watching. They were just giving it their all, playing like it was any other night, more moved by the music they had made by any crowd or lack thereof. Post-punk soundscapes with stabs of strange rhythm. It's a kind of slow, powerful music that gets into your heart and makes you feel forever. At least that's what I felt. At the end of the show, I was the only person dancing and one of 2 people even watching. They left pretty soon afterward.

I can understand that a lot of people wouldn't like either of these bands, but I just wanted to share that I had a wonderful night out on the town by myself and caught something I hadn't expected to experience. I could have planned this for a century and it wouldn't have touched me the same way, but I went out spontaneously and had my life set on fire. So there.

Money Spending Time.

Tue, 02 Dec 2008 02:29:45 GMT

So you might remember the two pairs of shoes I posted about a few weeks back. I really really wanted them, and putting them together in one place just made me feel the burn even worse. So I thought about it, and I settled with myself. I thought, if I have an alright amount of money after buying the christmas gifts I've been planning, I'll shell out the $200 for these two pairs of shoes. I mean, shoes are something I'm going to use, and if they look good, I'll use them even more. And even though I have a lot of pairs of shoes, I really don't wear more than a few pairs that often. What I need from my shoe wardrobe is a nice pair of boots, a nice pair of oxfords or loafers (preferably loafers, because oxfords just look silly on a grown man), and 1, maybe 2, pairs of good solid sneakers (probably one pair of chuck taylors and one pair of vans or the like). I was ready.

Step one, go see just how much money I'm looking at. But wait! It appears that the webiste I found these shoes on only has them in a 10, which is just too big for me. I've tried wearing tens before and it's just silly. Does not work, my friends. It makes my feet look huge, it's uncomfortable, and it causes the shoes to deteriorate in a strange way.

That's okay, though, I thought, I'll just check other websites. I've got to be able to find these shoes somewhere else. But no. No. The price markup at other stores is around $100 for the kenneth cole boots (and that's ridiculous) and $50 for the steve madden loafers. And twice the amount per pair I had reconciled myself with is too much. So it's back to me not needing shoes. I'll just drool over the pictures for now.

Some things I did spend some money on follow:

Yamaha DD-5 drum pads. I've been wanting a set of these, and I got this pretty cheap on ebay. If it works, I'm golden. I can continue being a genius and never sharing it with any of you. If not, whatever. That's life.

Omega the Unknown hardcover, written by Jonathan Lethem. I like Lethem a lot, and I read a few of these issues when they came out last year. I buckled and bought it on Half.com, where I got it for around $20 bucks. I read it already, and it was good. I can probably pull $7 or $8 off of it at a yard sale.

Black sweater and grey patterned trousers. I buckled here, okay? I didn't need this shit, but I've been doing really well about not spending a lot on clothes, and I bought them at Old Navy, meaning that they fit me awkwardly and were inexpensive. That way, I won't feel good about spending the money, and I didn't spend that much to begin with.

I'll end this with a purchase I plan to make.

Yamaha Rx15. Again, this is pretty cheap, I'll get a lot of use out of it, and I've been wanting a drum machine hard. This will conclude my christmastime for myself.

You drink a lot of coffee for a teenager

Wed, 26 Nov 2008 04:47:06 GMT

pt. 1: Funny Things From the Mouth of Albert, from Kenya

"What should I have to drink, a hot chocolate or a beer? It's beer time, in fact." (spoken at 12pm).

"Watch me out, I have knives!" (spoken while Albert was carrying a handful of kitchen knives).

"Jason. Can I borrow your cigarette?" (spoken in hushed tones approximately once a month. It should be added that Albert has let me borrow his cigarette on many occassions).

pt. 2: No Parents

No Parents just finished recording the instrumental tracks for our debut EP with Lynn Bridges. It took approximately 18 hours for us to record 7 songs. The vocals have yet to be finished. It was frustrating, but the tracks sound really good and we are all very satisfied. Michael is going to record vocals and to pass along our wishes for the final mix on Friday. Isabel Barnes is contributing a collage for the cover artwork, so be on the lookout for the release on Cigar Box Home Library sometime in the next 3 months. It will knock the shit out of your ass.

pt. 3: Funny Things From the Mouth of Lynn Bridges

"A little scootch never hurt nobody, you can quote me on that." (spoken often).

"We can't start until Talk of the Nation goes off, it's Big Bob Schieffer."

(All spoken at a very fast pace in a thick southern accent.)

pt. 4: Working

I missed work on Saturday, and called in late on Monday. As penance, I received a call today informing me that I was scheduled to work. I normally have Tuesdays off. Also, I get to work Friday, a day that many of you will be sitting at home, sleeping late to recover from the insane amounts of foodstuffs you have stuffed into your body on Thursday. I have Thursday off, so I guess it's good that I was able to make up some hours, but holidays don't really count as off days, because you aren't able to get anything done. Normally I use Tuesdays to do my laundry and tidy up the mess I've accumulated over the week. I can't wait until next week.

Fri, 21 Nov 2008 19:11:41 GMT

I really want these two pairs of shoes.

I have a lot of shoes, and I don't need more. I don't need to spend money, and I was doing very well not desiring to spend money on stupid things. But I want these two pairs of shoes.

Another Thing I Like Lately

Thu, 20 Nov 2008 07:01:26 GMT

This Heat - Deceit (1981).

Thu, 20 Nov 2008 02:59:52 GMT

Something funny that happened today:
I lost my phone charger the other day. Last night I finally realized that I wasn't going to find it, so I went to buy one at the AT&T store. Apparently a phone charger costs $30, but I didn't let it get me down. When shit like that happens, I try really hard to admit that I wouldn't have had to deal with it if I hadn't been irresponsible to begin with. Oh well, charge it to the game. I went home and charged my phone while I hung out for a bit. Then I remembered I needed laundry detergent and drove to get it. I dropped my phone under the seat, and when I reached to get it I put my hand right on my old phone charger. $30 for nothing. At least I have 2 of them now, I guess?

Things that I've liked lately:

Lil' Wayne - Tha Carter III. I know this shit is 2 years old, but it's fucking crazy. Like it doesn't make any sense. I like it.

Paul Auster

Spells

Le Mepris It's strange to say that I like this film, because it was painful. But I can definitely appreciate that it accurately portrays what it is attempting to portray. Godard employs a technique similar to the one he used in this scene from Le Weekend, in which we experience a traffic jam via a single shot lasting 20 minutes (this clip is truncated down to 7 and a half). Le Mepris, which deals with the breakup of a marriage, mainly takes place in the apartment of the lead couple, played by Brigitte Bardot and Michael Piccole, as they have an argument. It seems like an annoying idea, and I can definitely tell you that it is an annoying reality, but I have never seen a more accurately portrayal or a more astute recapturing of what it feels like to be in that situation, in which your relationship is definitely ending, but you don't know why, the other person won't leave, and you don't want to go, either. God, it pissed me off, and also reminded me that I should remain single for a while longer.
(See Also: They Shoot Horses, Don't They: directed by Sidney Pollack, featuring Jane Fonda as the lead in a film about a depression-era dance marathon. Both the novel by Horace McCoy and the film are extremely nihilistc and hard-boiled, but Pollack's film realization takes the novel, which is a relatively short read, and makes it into an emotional investment. Fonda's (over)acting lends much aid in this department. It feels like this movie goes on for days, which is apt considering that it is portraying a dance-marathon which lasted, despite the fatigue of the participants, for several months.)

Mutant Sounds

no longer forgotten music

I have to say that me liking these things is yet another testament to the fact that I enjoy things that annoy the fuck out of other people, both in their pretentiousness (with the exception of Tha Carter III) and their actually annoying-ness. Have I become John Robertson McIlwain? Actually, there is nothing annoying annoying about Spells or Paul Auster.

P.S: You know that thing where you bend down to do something and hit your head when you straighten up? In my life I have done that probably more than anyone in the history of the universe. Once I hit my head on a dryer door so hard that I gave myself a concussion.

small things i like

Tue, 18 Nov 2008 05:24:20 GMT

nervous people.

jeff magnum's voice on the second chorus of "i have been floated" he's being a brother, and for outsiders, it's a puzzle to place together.

the trumpet on nation of ulysses recordings. how brash and awesome. "who's got the real anti-parent culture sound (bwanh! bwanh! bwanh! bwanh!)

some good things about me

Tue, 18 Nov 2008 05:16:00 GMT

This is for me.

1.) I am loyal. If you are good to me and understand the basics of being a friend to someone, I will probably go to insane lengths to show how much you mean to me. I understand I take this too far sometimes and there are problems with everything, but I feel that mostly this is something good about me.

2.) I don't need much from you. My closest friends are not people who I ask favors of all the time. That's not to say that my good friends don't help me, and that's not to say that I don't ask sometimes. It's not to say that I am not difficult to be around sometimes. But I sort things out on my own, in my own time, in my own head. If you understand that sometimes I go off on my own, I'm pretty low maintenance.

3.) I have good ideas, and I'm learning to make them good realities.

4.) I listen well, and I want to help you work through your problems if you need help. I'll take you out for dinner. I'll buy you a drink and help you forget that anything's wrong for a little while. I can talk to you about why your problem is not insurmountable.

5.) I know how to apologize. And if you're good at conversations, I will admit to you when I'm wrong.

6.) I learn from what you tell me. I learn from what I tell myself.

7.) I am curious. I appreciate your expression and explorations of self.

Please. Help me not to let my bad attributes outshine these small, good things about myself. When I am at my best, I am small and unobtrusive. Let's try to keep me quiet.

Tue, 18 Nov 2008 03:51:27 GMT

Today I realized that I hide all of the things about myself that are good, or assume people will take them for granted, and exaggerate the ugly and unpleasant aspects of myself from others.

This is a sad thing to realize about yourself.

Or something to work on, at least.

Reefer Sutherland

Sat, 15 Nov 2008 15:23:01 GMT

Here's what I think about staying in.

Pros:
Hang out with friends on a small scale. Invite people over when you want, have better conversations.

Getting shit done.

Not drinking.

Sleeping well, and when I want to.

Saving money.

No scrutiny.

Cons:
?

Funny and Tender Titty Stories.

Fri, 14 Nov 2008 06:24:57 GMT

I was just on the toilet, and my chest started itching. My chest starting itching like, right on my pectoral area, there. You know, on and around my nipples. A kind of tired itch, like not like a bug bite but kind of a muscle itch. It didn't warrant fingernails, so I found myself sitting on the toilet rubbing my tits with the palms of my hands for a few seconds before I realized what was going on.

Flashback

Late-fall 06. It's sweater weather, probably sometime around this time of year. I have on a pair of jeans and two of my favorite upper-body articles of clothing (one of which is now lost to a girl): A red cashmere sweater (of course a girl took that!) and a blue plaid button up. The problem is that the button up is western style, with two pearlized buttons located approximately where my nipples are, and the sweater is thin. It isn't until I go to use the bathroom at work (at a job I've only had for 2 months, and a job that is my first job in 2 years) and look at myself in the mirror for the first time that day (I often neglect to do this when I'm dressing) that I see that I appear to have huge, erect nipples on my chest.

In point of fact, I do not have huge nipples on my chest. Even when erect, they rarely show through my clothing.

Flash-forward

The girl who stole the sweater, I used to laugh when she was dressing. Even though her breasts were pert, not sagging in the least, the way she put on her brassiere made it necessary for her to reach inside it and pull breast one and breast two, a.k.a. left breast and right breast from either side of her body into the cups. It was something funny to see, a girl in panties and a bra, staring off into space (she was, and surely still is, a thoughtful person, even when dressing), pulling her boobs into the cups of her bra.

And let's be fair, I surely loaned the sweater to her and forgot it. And for God's sake it certainly looks better on her than me. No hard feelings there.

Flash-wayback

When I was really little, the only heating system we had in our house was a woodstove, so my parents would take my sister and I out into the woods around the house to bust up fire wood. I was around 6, so I gathered kindling, while my pubescent sister was expected to chop wood along with mom and dad. Chopping wood tends to suck ass, particularly if you're 12 years old. It's hard to get the axe to hit the cord right, and it really hurts to slap an axe sideways into a cut log with all of your strength, and letting the axe go will probably get your ass chewed out for you. My sister was complaining to my dad,and after a while he pulled her aside and told her it'd make her boobs get bigger if she kept at it. "Really?" "Look at your mom." (My dad has a way of saying things like this under his breath, especially when he's playing a joke on you. Like he wants to keep it a secret from my mom, who definitely would get pissed if she heard him, and also like if he were to speak any louder he'd burst out laughing, which he has done, for the record, every time he's told this story in years since.) Sis carried on without complaint for the rest of the day.

Tue, 11 Nov 2008 04:55:05 GMT

My mutton chops are gone. I was unable to stand them anymore. I don't like the pubic hair on my pubic area, and while I thought the chops looked pretty good, why would I want pubic hair on my face?

Yesterday at the CBHL meeting we elected officers. I am quite optimistic about the future of CBHL.

I watched a bunch of movies last week. Roundup!

Black Orpheus, filmed by French director Marcel Camus in Brazil, and featuring a Brazilian cast. The film retells the Orpheus myth with an all-black cast, but the music and dancing are fabulous. Also, the retelling is just good. Lots of crazy shit. Way worth watching!

Alice, by director Jan Svankmajer. I'd been meaning to watch this for a long time, and I only now got around to it. Svankmajer is a creepy motherfucker. Also, his retellings so completely fuck up the original source materials he uses that it's awesome to try and piece together what comes from where.

The Science of Sleep. This movie is nothing but a shitty plot as an excuse to show a whole bunch of cool images (the trademark of Michel Gondry) and to show how hot and awesome Charlotte Gainsbourg is on film, but those two things are a good excuse to stare at your television for 2 hours, so whatever.

Mister Lonely by Harmony Korinne. I'm a Korinne fan. This is a fucked up premise and a lot of cool shit happens, like an Abraham Lincoln impersonator delivering the Gettysburg Address while spinning a basketball on his finger, and a nun jumping out of an airplane on a BMX bike. Worth watching.